What's holding you Back???

FINALLY I've had the chance to catch up on Tiny & Toya and I must say, it actually made me think. Really I just expected to be entertained by Tiny's {overly} Southern drawl and both of the ladies' story. I love seeing how other people live their lives. Seeing how they deal with life in general. Be it on tv or getting to know new people in my own life. I think it's important to know that there is more to life, more to the world than what you're used to seeing day to day in your own.
After recapping all 4 episodes that I've missed since the shows premier I actually feel motivated to go further with my own goals and aspirations. From each story I've gained something. Like Tiny's situation, I too have wondered if fighting to maintain my individuality will create a gap in my relationship. I have since realized that you absolutely have to in order to maintain a healthy relationship, even if it's not exactly what he may want at the time. But I know first hand how it can be really hard to 'rock the boat' when things seem to be coming along peacefully. When you finally get what you want, you tend to feel kind of guilty about wanting more. But it's human nature to continue to strive for bigger and better. Not only that, you have to be true to who you are or you'll begin to resent the other person, maybe even yourself for all the things you didn't do.
Toya, wow. The family issues I realate to 100%. My mom wasn't/isn't on drugs. But she wasn't there. To be fair, she was working to keep us out of the lifestyle that she grew up with. She wanted better for her kids, and we got it. I give her much credit for that. We never went without the neccesities, but that was it. I kind of feel like she did what she had to do, and that was it. Things that I should have learned as a girl, I didn't. Instead I'm learning as I go. Relationships that should have been cultivated as I grew up, weren't. I'm still learning things now as an adult that, in my opinion I should already know. Things that I worried about as a young adult were things that my friends are still not worrying about. All of which has made me into the self sufficient person that I am today ONLY because I decided a long time ago that the blame game wasn't going to help me to survive. I have grown a great deal, so yeah I know that my mom did the best she knew how to do, and I can't expect more than that. But it does hurt still when I'm with my friends and their families and you see the love. I didn't really feel that growing up in my home. I don't feel like I can call my Mom if all else fails. Or anyone else for that matter. I feel like I have no choice but to make it and I don't want my daughter to feel like that. I will have her back first and foremost no matter what happens and I want her to know that in her heart. All of my babies. Nothing should ever be more important than family.
What it all comes down to is that everyone is human. No matter how much money or fame you have aquired, you are still a PERSON. We all have our pains and struggles as well as our triumphs. I laughed, I cried. I'm definitely going to try catch the show. Or atleast keep up on Bet.com!!!

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6 comments:

SydneyRenee' said...

i loved this blog. The show is great too

P. White said...

im lovin the show too but i gotta admit i just watch to see what hairstyle and clothes toya has on..lol...but the message they sent is very inspiring.

tha unpretentious narcissist© said...

i get what you're saying, but i think the show is stupid. and i know both Tiny & Toya. reality shows have the tendency to focus on things for drama purposes. i think the show is trying to depict them both as "denser" then they actually are. i guess that's why i'm not really a fan. i mean i watch with my chick, but there is no entertainment value i get out of it. but maybe it's a chick thing anyway, right? i dunno. but BET should actually die a fast death. cause this slow death they've been doing for the past decade is taking too long.

Ms. T said...

This is a really good piece, I have a article on Tiny and Toya as well, mine is a little more opinionated but you shud check it out.

Become a follower of my blog
www.avalleyofhearts.blogspot.com

Thanks
Ms.T

Ciara Denise said...

Thanks everyone for the luv!!! To tha unpretentious narcissist, I think maybe the fact that you know them personally maybe does lend to why you're not really feeling the show. The majority of us don't know them, so we really didn't have any expectations of what they should be like. Myself, I really didn't expect much because I am used to the nonsense BET is known for, but I was pleasantly surprised. I didn't walk away thinking the girls were stupid at all. They came off as real to me, because I saw them dealing with real issues. Of course I was checking for the lifestyles as well, because let's face it ... they wouldn't be on tv if they were broke nobodies. I'm just glad that I walked away with more than the urge to buy something expensive.

prashant said...

This is a really good piece, I have a article on Tiny and Toya as well, mine is a little more opinionated but you shuld check it out.


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